It began with a vagina shaped and intricately decorated sugar cookie and ended last night over a revolting bottle of Pimms. My uncle, for being the adulterous man he is, is disgusted by the female anatomy; therefore, like any niece I took my beloved vagina sugar cookie and rubbed the icing-ed clitoris all over his face Christmas Eve. Part of this was just hilarity and an act of familial love, but the other part was frustration and anger that my body, any woman’s body, could be seen as revolting. A man so willing to buy his son guns, yet reluctant and firm in his declaration that his daughter not have her belly button pierced baffled me. I could not comprehend such ignorance and disdain. Alas, belly button piercing is a sign of sexuality and empowerment, and he was denying his daughter of owning her body. The stereotypical father protecting his daughter from the world, so in the secrecy of a Christmas Eve morning she and I had her belly button pierced. This began the holiday hoe down.
My cousin, my aunt, and I stood in the waiting room waiting….not patiently. Italians do not wait nor are they patient. Our family tattooer and piercier arrived. After signing documents and providing ids it was time. Time to crush the patriarchy. I was proud of my cousin and my aunt for their decision to get her belly button pierced. It was a step in the right direction of women discovering their bodies and claiming their right to them. I’ve been tasked with guiding my 14 year old cousin, guiding her in the waters of sex and life.
The rest of the Christmas holiday seemed to be a blur. Fogged over by explosive conversations about Trump and scoldings by elders for my foul mouth and radicalization. Back in reality I met up with some wonderful high school sweethearts of mine at our local hangout. A mansion off the mainline packed with good liquor and no adult supervision. As if 17 year olds again we drank and talked about sex, relationships, life, and 4d dimensional worlds. The mistakes of our past led to new foundations for our future. We spoke of love and loss while drinking our concoctions. We are just as confused about life as we were 5 years ago only in different ways and different terms. We were and have grown into such divergent women. Divergent strong willed independent women that I will maintain the best of relationships with.
and then I discovered my best friend is pregnant…….